Tag Archives: tom harrison

DCMS Committee Investigation Into The Future Of English Cricket

Yates was somewhat taken aback upon reading that the DCMS Committee will be inviting The Mediocre Men (that’s Colin Graves and Tom Harrison to new readers) to an evidence giving session focusing on the future of English Cricket.

Let’s put this in context.

Around the time of the release of the excellent film Death Of A Gentleman, a demonstration mourning the death of Test Cricket was held outside The Oval to highlight the unacceptable conflicts of interest in the highest level of our game’s governance. Not only were Jarrod Kimber, Sam Collins and my dear wife there, but so was one Damian Collins MP.

Collins promised that he would get Giles Clarke (who was then in charge of the ECB and who came out of the DOAG film looking a complete and utter Gareth Hunt) up before the DCMS Committee.

Come August 2019, the same Damian Collins is now Chair of the DCMS Committee and this promise has never even come close to being delivered. Collins seems reluctant to address or discuss this with anyone, a reluctance that suggests some kind of vested interest. Damn sure doesn’t pass the sniff test.

And yet here we are, official confirmation of The Mediocre Men coming before this Committee.

What’s changed? Why the sudden interest from Collins now?

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Fit For Purpose?

Are the ECB Management Fit For Purpose?

“Fit for purpose” is an interesting phrase.  One of those business bullshit phrases but one that carries some actual clout.  It is subjective; who decides what constitutes “fit for purpose”?  What one may hold as a definition will differ from that held by others.

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Durham Shafted

Yesterday’s “punishment” handed out by the ECB to Durham CCC was as violent and brutal a shafting as Yates has ever seen. Anywhere.  The ECB completely ignored their own part in affairs – it was the ECB who encouraged Durham to become part of a system that would leave them desperately reliant on getting a test match to cover the costs of their applying for the right to host it – and handed down a massively disproportionate and unfair sanctioning.

It goes without saying that Yates is not impressed by this latest batch of imbecility from the ECB.  ECB sanctioning decisions have no right of appeal, just like the kangaroo court that is the Cricket Disciplinary Committee, so those affected by the decision can’t do a damn thing about it.

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The Parable of Corporate Bullshit

The ongoing discussion between the pro-City franchise supporters and those of us who won’t accept being ridden over by the ECB’s insistence on gagging clauses and attempts to present a fait accompli gives Yates an opportunity to share a parable with y’all.

Pour yourself a nice mug of tea, settle back and enjoy this Parable of Corporate Bullshit

It was a Tuesday morning.  Yates had been doing his usual techie things in the server room and emerged for a mouthful of coffee.  The atmosphere in the section by the server room was unusually manic.  No inspections were impending, maybe the section manager’s dodgy deals and misdeeds had been discovered and he’d been sacked.  This thought pleased Yates greatly.

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City Based Franchises: Greed Ahead Of The Game

Having already written about the concept of City based T20 Franchises, more has come to light about the Mediocre Men’s plans.

Remember, this is all going on behind a veil of secrecy – counties have been subject to gagging clauses so cannot comment on anything they may be asked by concerned county supporters and members.

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Oh Look – Another List On The Internet

Oh look, another list on the Internet. Big fat hairy deal. When someone gets short of decent content, be it original or thought provoking, they invariably resort to that most overused thing – the list.  The Cricketer magazine has come up with its own English Cricket Power List.

When you’ve been around science fiction fandom and classic rock fandom as long as Yates has you come to view lists as nothing more than an attempt at grabbing attention, often through contentious opinions, arse kissing, spurious bullshit or trying to settle a score.

Doctor Who, Space:1999, Stingray fandom have all had their (un) civil war moments, never mind trying to discuss certain rock guitarists or drummers. This sort of stuff has been going on for years; the world wide web in particular has given platforms to all sorts of people, some of whom probably need to open their bedroom windows, get a shower and get out a bit more while others really need to wake up, get a spine and engage their critical thinking abilities.

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The Mediocre Men: Graves & Harrison’s T20 Plans

Relative silence here doesn’t mean all is well with the cricket world. Far from it. The BCCI is trying everything it can to avoid implementing the Lodha Review despite being told by the Supreme Court to stop fannying around and bloody well do it. South Africa’s national team is now subject to the kind of government interference the ICC is supposed to be intolerant of. Pakistan still haven’t played a home test match in Christ knows how long and should not have been allowed to bring Mohammad Amir to the UK for their tour. Australia have been exposed as being bloody awful against spin and just given the kind of stuffing Yates would like to give Bonnie Langford. Andre Russell is allowed to play cricket despite allegedly missing three drug tests. And Giles Clarke is still president of the ECB.

All is definitely not well with the game.

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Bellendery In Extremis

Yates’ Latin teacher was a very wise man. Of course, this was something which only became apparent with the passage of time. One of the many wise things he said was that history repeats itself. Yates will go further and say that if history repeats itself in the same organisation just over a year later then the people in that organisation are imbecilic bellends of the worst kind.

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Change Is Afoot: Downton Sacked

Yates scared the people in the train carriage coming home yesterday as he shouted “Yes!” and fistpumped to his reading the news that Paul Downton has been sacked from his role at the ECB.

After several months of highlighting Downton’s failings the question any of us would like answered is “What tipped the scales?” What finally made Tom Harrison make the right but overdue decision?

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The Parable Of The Poor Director

Some years ago an organisation made a director level appointment.  There was the usual top brass bullshit and business buzzword bingo as part of the introductory PR spin.  Big things were clearly expected from this new director.

It wasn’t long before this director’s significant flaws came to the fore.  The first major decision made by this new director was based entirely on his own prejudices, refusing to present an honest justification and completely ignoring the existing excellent and continuing performance of the organisation.

Other decisions were also flawed, appointments made crucially so.  The organisation’s performance, brand and reputation were being damaged by a supposedly safe pair of hands.

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