Category Archives: International Cricket

ECB In Couldn’t Manage An Orgy In A Brothel Shocker

The news that KP has quit One Day International and T20 International cricket came as a bit of a surprise to Yates.  Yes, the ECB’s recent fining of KP for a relatively inoffensive tweet was pathetic, pedantic and shows how scared the ECB is of upsetting a major source of its income but may well have had more of an effect than many would have thought.

In his statement KP made it clear that he wanted to play in the upcoming World T20 tournament but that ECB rules prevent him from retiring from one of the limited over formats.  That the ECB seemed incapable of a sensible degree of flexibility and are happy to see KP quit begs the question just what kind of leaders do the ECB have.

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England: Frozen Against Spin?

Congratulations to Pakistan on their test and series win over England.  Misbah-ul-Haq’s calm captaincy has helped unite and shape this Pakistan team into a cohesive and, more importantly consistent unit.  It used to be said that the only thing that was consistent about Pakistan was that you were never sure which side would turn up.  Perhaps that is changing, and about time.

The departure of Iajz Butt from the PCB could not have come soon enough.  That he had never arrived there in the first place must be the wish of many more than just myself.  With continued calm captaincy and leadership, provided that the retards are kept from positions of power and influence at the PCB, this Pakistan team could become a very very good side indeed.

Yates likes Mohammad Hafeez and Saeed Ajmal in particular and enjoys watching Umar Gul and Younis Khan too.  Make no mistake, this series win is well deserved and a rocket up the backside of the England batting.  So while Yates raises a mug of Darjeeling to Misbah and his team, the attention must now turn to the England batting.

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The Spot-fixing Mess

The trial is over.  Though we still have the inevitable appeals to come.  The fixer and the three cricketers are now spending their time at the invitation of Her Britannic Majesty as sentenced by Mr Justice Cooke, whose comments are worth reading.

This whole thing has been bemusing, bewitching, infuriating, confounding but above all deeply saddening.  As revelation after revelation was reported on Twitter by @Cricketer_RDJ, Yates could be seen going about his work with looks of all those feelings on his face.  The game Yates loves, the game which stood as a byword for everything right and proper, the game Yates has spent years of his life watching, discussing and following has been betrayed, vilely soiled upon from a great height.

And it may never be the same again.

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Alternative ICC Awards

The annual self-congratulatory ICC Awards bash is being held today.  There will be the usual awards which won’t really inspire, surprise or generate pages of discussion on the internet.  Unless we include the “OMG! Why isn’t SACHIN the winner of every award?” fandrones out there.

Cynical? Maybe.  But what purpose does this bash actually serve other than a self-promotion tool for the ICC?

So let’s jazz things up a bit by suggesting a few awards of our own for Haroon Lorgat to consider.  Let’s start the ball rolling with a couple of suggestions…

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Oi! BCCI! Back Off!

The stuffing that India’s cricketers have taken from England has focused attention on several aspects of India’s cricket.  Most notably the fielding of the India team has been some of the worst Yates has seen in recent times.  When Yates says “I would be embarrassed to have fielded like that!” then you are in trouble.  Yates has seen plenty of village fielding and had a few of his own village moments.  That India team did not perform like a team whose fielding coach is Trevor Penney.  Yates has seen better fielding efforts from five year old children and mid 30 year olds coming out of hospital after operations on their knackers.

So when Nasser Hussain compared India’s fielding efforts to those of donkeys many will have felt the comparison justified if somewhat lacking in critical sting.  Yates has heard far stronger and less politically correct terms used to describe India’s efforts in the field in this series.

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