Category Archives: ethics

DCMS Committee Investigation Into The Future Of English Cricket

Yates was somewhat taken aback upon reading that the DCMS Committee will be inviting The Mediocre Men (that’s Colin Graves and Tom Harrison to new readers) to an evidence giving session focusing on the future of English Cricket.

Let’s put this in context.

Around the time of the release of the excellent film Death Of A Gentleman, a demonstration mourning the death of Test Cricket was held outside The Oval to highlight the unacceptable conflicts of interest in the highest level of our game’s governance. Not only were Jarrod Kimber, Sam Collins and my dear wife there, but so was one Damian Collins MP.

Collins promised that he would get Giles Clarke (who was then in charge of the ECB and who came out of the DOAG film looking a complete and utter Gareth Hunt) up before the DCMS Committee.

Come August 2019, the same Damian Collins is now Chair of the DCMS Committee and this promise has never even come close to being delivered. Collins seems reluctant to address or discuss this with anyone, a reluctance that suggests some kind of vested interest. Damn sure doesn’t pass the sniff test.

And yet here we are, official confirmation of The Mediocre Men coming before this Committee.

What’s changed? Why the sudden interest from Collins now?

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On Former Players Turning Pundits

This piece is one that had been brewing for a while.  Recent events compelled its completion.

More and more it seems that a career in professional sport is seen as a springboard into the media covering that sport.  Broadcasters and journalists are being replaced by former players, some of whom are little more than mouthpieces, puppets or poor jester impersonations.

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Fit For Purpose?

Are the ECB Management Fit For Purpose?

“Fit for purpose” is an interesting phrase.  One of those business bullshit phrases but one that carries some actual clout.  It is subjective; who decides what constitutes “fit for purpose”?  What one may hold as a definition will differ from that held by others.

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Durham Shafted

Yesterday’s “punishment” handed out by the ECB to Durham CCC was as violent and brutal a shafting as Yates has ever seen. Anywhere.  The ECB completely ignored their own part in affairs – it was the ECB who encouraged Durham to become part of a system that would leave them desperately reliant on getting a test match to cover the costs of their applying for the right to host it – and handed down a massively disproportionate and unfair sanctioning.

It goes without saying that Yates is not impressed by this latest batch of imbecility from the ECB.  ECB sanctioning decisions have no right of appeal, just like the kangaroo court that is the Cricket Disciplinary Committee, so those affected by the decision can’t do a damn thing about it.

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Thieving Scum

Dear readers, those of you on Twitter might have seen, been followed, unfollowed and followed again by accounts claiming to be a County “Fan App”. There are 18 of them, one for each first class county. They look almost official, claiming that “[County name] Fan App is the best way to keep up to date with the club. Coming soon for iOS & Android!” but they were all created by a company called Spontly.

Did you know these “Fan App” sites have been ripping off content from sites belonging to your county club, other county club sites, the BBC and photographers? Here’s some proof:

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Death Of A Gentleman Review

For those of us deemed “outside cricket”, who follow the game and ask the awkward questions that have seen us branded with the OC monicker, Jarrod Kimber and Sam Collins’ Death of A Gentleman is confirmation of the slime, sleaze, conflicts of interest and corruption at the heart of cricket’s global governance. If you like or love cricket and aren’t aware of or up to date with the happenings in the game’s governance then you need to see this film. No ifs or buts, you must see this film.

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Bellendery In Extremis

Yates’ Latin teacher was a very wise man. Of course, this was something which only became apparent with the passage of time. One of the many wise things he said was that history repeats itself. Yates will go further and say that if history repeats itself in the same organisation just over a year later then the people in that organisation are imbecilic bellends of the worst kind.

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Hey Dave! An Open Letter To David Richardson

Dear Dave,

Yates is sorry to hear you’re a bit put out by the recent leaks of Lou Vincent and Brendan McCullum’s testimonies to the ACSU.

But you can’t be surprised at the frustration being felt by fans around the world that so few disciplinary measures or convictions have been achieved or contributed by the ACSU.  By so few I mean zero. Zip. None. Naff all. Not a God Damn thing.  The only convictions that have been achieved have come via discredited newspapers running scams and police tapping phone lines.  Nowhere was the ACSU to be seen.

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Team Waitrose Or Team BBC? Agnew Must Decide

You may have seen the cringingly awful Waitrose promo video that hit the net last week and then mysteriously disappeared.

If you didn’t see it then let Yates provide a brief summary.

“Starring” Jimmy Anderson and Stuart Broad doing the Full Kit W****rs thing in a Waitrose store with BBC Cricket Correspondent Jonathan Agnew providing TMS style commentary.  The advert featured Jimmy rubbing an apple on his groin a la polishing the ball, Stuart diving to catch something dropped by a shopper, David “Bumble” Lloyd as a delivery driver and a nauseating name check for Paul Downton right at the end.

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ECB England – A Devalued Team

The announcement of Peter Moores as England Head Coach has confirmed Yates’ thinking since Paul Downton was announced as Managing Director of England Cricket.

Instead of harshly examining a system which is obsessed with turning fast bowlers into musclebound mechanical men who break down far too often or looking into why the batting coaches were unable to get through to the England top order how to play Mitchell Johnson, Downton decided that he’s tired of dealing with those bloody irritating colonials who speak their mind and used the Ashes whitewash as the ideal opportunity to saddle Kevin Pietersen with the blame.

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