Category Archives: ECB

Ben Stokes Trial Aftermath

Ben Stokes has been found not guilty of affray.  Due Process has been followed and we must respect the decision of the jury. In the aftermath of these proceedings questions are already being asked of the CPS and attention is now turning to the ECB.

Specifically the Kangaroo Court known as the Cricket Discipline Commission and what the ECB will do following the case. Yates has written previously about the CDC in very disparaging terms and has very little confidence in it.  Perception here is that the CDC couldn’t be more Kangaroo if it was staffed by Australians dressed in Skippy costumes, drinking Castlemaine XXXX and doing Bill Lawry impressions.

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Damian! Damian! It’s All About Me, Damian!

Damian Collins MP has suddenly gotten very ballsy and issued a formal DCMS Committee summons to Mark Zuckerberg, CEO of Facebook.

Given the public exposure about Facebook and Cambridge Analytica this is one case where doing bugger all isn’t seen as a sensible thing to do, even if government minsters generally haven’t got a Scooby about internet and tech issues.

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On Former Players Turning Pundits

This piece is one that had been brewing for a while.  Recent events compelled its completion.

More and more it seems that a career in professional sport is seen as a springboard into the media covering that sport.  Broadcasters and journalists are being replaced by former players, some of whom are little more than mouthpieces, puppets or poor jester impersonations.

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Fit For Purpose?

Are the ECB Management Fit For Purpose?

“Fit for purpose” is an interesting phrase.  One of those business bullshit phrases but one that carries some actual clout.  It is subjective; who decides what constitutes “fit for purpose”?  What one may hold as a definition will differ from that held by others.

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Durham Shafted

Yesterday’s “punishment” handed out by the ECB to Durham CCC was as violent and brutal a shafting as Yates has ever seen. Anywhere.  The ECB completely ignored their own part in affairs – it was the ECB who encouraged Durham to become part of a system that would leave them desperately reliant on getting a test match to cover the costs of their applying for the right to host it – and handed down a massively disproportionate and unfair sanctioning.

It goes without saying that Yates is not impressed by this latest batch of imbecility from the ECB.  ECB sanctioning decisions have no right of appeal, just like the kangaroo court that is the Cricket Disciplinary Committee, so those affected by the decision can’t do a damn thing about it.

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The Parable of Corporate Bullshit

The ongoing discussion between the pro-City franchise supporters and those of us who won’t accept being ridden over by the ECB’s insistence on gagging clauses and attempts to present a fait accompli gives Yates an opportunity to share a parable with y’all.

Pour yourself a nice mug of tea, settle back and enjoy this Parable of Corporate Bullshit

It was a Tuesday morning.  Yates had been doing his usual techie things in the server room and emerged for a mouthful of coffee.  The atmosphere in the section by the server room was unusually manic.  No inspections were impending, maybe the section manager’s dodgy deals and misdeeds had been discovered and he’d been sacked.  This thought pleased Yates greatly.

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Poison and Jingoism

Yates has written previously about so-called journalists who seem capable of only producing content of which the ECB would approve. Either because there’s an ECB hand shoved up their arse or because they are a really vile piece of filth.

Paul Newman falls into this latter category. People have tweeted that he’s a nice chap, even decent and only doing his job.

The more Yates thinks about that the more he comes to one simple conclusion: that’s bollocks.

Yates firmly believes that whatever you write, people put an element of themselves in that writing. Paul Newman’s track record at the Daily Heil speaks for itself: there’s nothing nice about any of his work for the Daily Heil. In fact there’s very little to like about the Daily Heil in general.

And “He’s only doing his job”? The Nuremberg defence. Really? That speaks for itself.  Bringing that up is an immediate loss of argument.

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City Based Franchises: Greed Ahead Of The Game

Having already written about the concept of City based T20 Franchises, more has come to light about the Mediocre Men’s plans.

Remember, this is all going on behind a veil of secrecy – counties have been subject to gagging clauses so cannot comment on anything they may be asked by concerned county supporters and members.

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Oh Look – Another List On The Internet

Oh look, another list on the Internet. Big fat hairy deal. When someone gets short of decent content, be it original or thought provoking, they invariably resort to that most overused thing – the list.  The Cricketer magazine has come up with its own English Cricket Power List.

When you’ve been around science fiction fandom and classic rock fandom as long as Yates has you come to view lists as nothing more than an attempt at grabbing attention, often through contentious opinions, arse kissing, spurious bullshit or trying to settle a score.

Doctor Who, Space:1999, Stingray fandom have all had their (un) civil war moments, never mind trying to discuss certain rock guitarists or drummers. This sort of stuff has been going on for years; the world wide web in particular has given platforms to all sorts of people, some of whom probably need to open their bedroom windows, get a shower and get out a bit more while others really need to wake up, get a spine and engage their critical thinking abilities.

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The Mediocre Men: Graves & Harrison’s T20 Plans

Relative silence here doesn’t mean all is well with the cricket world. Far from it. The BCCI is trying everything it can to avoid implementing the Lodha Review despite being told by the Supreme Court to stop fannying around and bloody well do it. South Africa’s national team is now subject to the kind of government interference the ICC is supposed to be intolerant of. Pakistan still haven’t played a home test match in Christ knows how long and should not have been allowed to bring Mohammad Amir to the UK for their tour. Australia have been exposed as being bloody awful against spin and just given the kind of stuffing Yates would like to give Bonnie Langford. Andre Russell is allowed to play cricket despite allegedly missing three drug tests. And Giles Clarke is still president of the ECB.

All is definitely not well with the game.

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