It’s that time of the year when people dressed as bananas can be seen in the vicinity of the historical building that is Alexandra Palace. It can only mean that the PDC World Darts Championships are here.
In a first attempt at punditry, Yates offers a few thoughts on possible upsets. First round games can sometimes be twitchy, if there are going to be any upsets they’re likely to be in this round.
Being a good Methodist boy Yates knows nothing about betting so take these predictions with a pinch of salt. Please don’t take these tips personally; Chez Yates we have our favourites and we wish them well regardless of what the tips may say.
As Lemmy sang, “It’s all about the game and how you play it”. A raised glass and good luck to everyone taking part.
Continue reading PDC World Darts Championships Predictions: Round 1
Folk may have seen the odd tweet or two about darts. Please say hello to Mike “The Elephant” Yates in this autobiographical post.
Growing up we always had darts on the tv if it was on. Winmau World Masters, News Of The World, Unipart Home Internationals and of course the Embassy World Professional Championship. World Of Sport sometimes showed Darts and it was on World Of Sport that I saw John Lowe hit the first televised 9 dart finish.
Eric Bristow was the big cheese, cocked little finger, cigarette in hand and big mouth. He was on his way to 5 world titles so could walk the walk as well as talk the talk. John Lowe was the England captain, calm and dignified. Pear shaped flights with unicorns and rainbows on. Still my favourite flight design now. My darting hero was and remains Bob Anderson.
Continue reading Introducing Mike “The Elephant” Yates
Are the ECB Management Fit For Purpose?
“Fit for purpose” is an interesting phrase. One of those business bullshit phrases but one that carries some actual clout. It is subjective; who decides what constitutes “fit for purpose”? What one may hold as a definition will differ from that held by others.
Continue reading Fit For Purpose?
Yesterday’s “punishment” handed out by the ECB to Durham CCC was as violent and brutal a shafting as Yates has ever seen. Anywhere. The ECB completely ignored their own part in affairs – it was the ECB who encouraged Durham to become part of a system that would leave them desperately reliant on getting a test match to cover the costs of their applying for the right to host it – and handed down a massively disproportionate and unfair sanctioning.
It goes without saying that Yates is not impressed by this latest batch of imbecility from the ECB. ECB sanctioning decisions have no right of appeal, just like the kangaroo court that is the Cricket Disciplinary Committee, so those affected by the decision can’t do a damn thing about it.
Continue reading Durham Shafted
The ongoing discussion between the pro-City franchise supporters and those of us who won’t accept being ridden over by the ECB’s insistence on gagging clauses and attempts to present a fait accompli gives Yates an opportunity to share a parable with y’all.
Pour yourself a nice mug of tea, settle back and enjoy this Parable of Corporate Bullshit
It was a Tuesday morning. Yates had been doing his usual techie things in the server room and emerged for a mouthful of coffee. The atmosphere in the section by the server room was unusually manic. No inspections were impending, maybe the section manager’s dodgy deals and misdeeds had been discovered and he’d been sacked. This thought pleased Yates greatly.
Continue reading The Parable of Corporate Bullshit
Yates has written previously about so-called journalists who seem capable of only producing content of which the ECB would approve. Either because there’s an ECB hand shoved up their arse or because they are a really vile piece of filth.
Paul Newman falls into this latter category. People have tweeted that he’s a nice chap, even decent and only doing his job.
The more Yates thinks about that the more he comes to one simple conclusion: that’s bollocks.
Yates firmly believes that whatever you write, people put an element of themselves in that writing. Paul Newman’s track record at the Daily Heil speaks for itself: there’s nothing nice about any of his work for the Daily Heil. In fact there’s very little to like about the Daily Heil in general.
And “He’s only doing his job”? The Nuremberg defence. Really? That speaks for itself. Bringing that up is an immediate loss of argument.
Continue reading Poison and Jingoism
Having already written about the concept of City based T20 Franchises, more has come to light about the Mediocre Men’s plans.
Remember, this is all going on behind a veil of secrecy – counties have been subject to gagging clauses so cannot comment on anything they may be asked by concerned county supporters and members.
Continue reading City Based Franchises: Greed Ahead Of The Game
Oh look, another list on the Internet. Big fat hairy deal. When someone gets short of decent content, be it original or thought provoking, they invariably resort to that most overused thing – the list. The Cricketer magazine has come up with its own English Cricket Power List.
When you’ve been around science fiction fandom and classic rock fandom as long as Yates has you come to view lists as nothing more than an attempt at grabbing attention, often through contentious opinions, arse kissing, spurious bullshit or trying to settle a score.
Doctor Who, Space:1999, Stingray fandom have all had their (un) civil war moments, never mind trying to discuss certain rock guitarists or drummers. This sort of stuff has been going on for years; the world wide web in particular has given platforms to all sorts of people, some of whom probably need to open their bedroom windows, get a shower and get out a bit more while others really need to wake up, get a spine and engage their critical thinking abilities.
Continue reading Oh Look – Another List On The Internet
Relative silence here doesn’t mean all is well with the cricket world. Far from it. The BCCI is trying everything it can to avoid implementing the Lodha Review despite being told by the Supreme Court to stop fannying around and bloody well do it. South Africa’s national team is now subject to the kind of government interference the ICC is supposed to be intolerant of. Pakistan still haven’t played a home test match in Christ knows how long and should not have been allowed to bring Mohammad Amir to the UK for their tour. Australia have been exposed as being bloody awful against spin and just given the kind of stuffing Yates would like to give Bonnie Langford. Andre Russell is allowed to play cricket despite allegedly missing three drug tests. And Giles Clarke is still president of the ECB.
All is definitely not well with the game.
Continue reading The Mediocre Men: Graves & Harrison’s T20 Plans
Yates was working on a piece about sponsorship and branding then something came along which was deserving of its own post. Yates was most annoyed to learn of the stupid behaviour of employees at Port of Tyne in threatening a photographer and film maker. At the time of writing Port of Tyne have yet to apologise to the photographer their staff harassed.
“How is this related to cricket?” Yates hears you ask.
Port of Tyne are Durham CCC’s sponsor for the Royal London One Day Cup.
Continue reading Durham CCC Sponsors Harass A Photographer